Claim's Cabbies Corner. Kill crazy rampage imminent.

[NorfolkNWeigh]

On the subject of pukers , I had a lad start to throw up one night and his mates either side of him caught it all in his jumper, I stopped they got out ,all was well. Until he pulled his jumper over his head! All over his face and head. I fucked off a bit sharpish, leaving them at the side of the road.

[paulplom]

I remember a mate spewing into his jumper in the back of a taxi one night.

[Eddie Honda]

#warrenwatch INTERNATIONAL

[mercrocker]

I had a taxi turn into Gardens one night. It was a fucker because I wanted "Close" which was eight streets away.

[Warren t claim]

From last night.

It was about 3am. I was pulling into a local 24 hour McDonald's drive through to exchange a winning Monopoly ticket for any regular McCafe hot drink when my graft phone rang.

"Hiya Waz, it's Ian (the operator) have you got a moment?"

He sounded serious. Never a good sign as last time he sounded this serious it was to tell me to phone CID as a girl I'd picked up had claimed that she'd been raped in the address I picked her up from and plod wanted to know if she'd told me anything.

"Err... yeah Ian. What's wrong?"

"You picked up three lads from 2 C******* Road earlier, did you have any problems with them?"

I remember the job well. I turned up at the pick up address to see all three of them getting out of a scabby 58 plate Transit XLWB instead of the front door of the pick up address. This alerted my senses and I explained to them that it's money up front, especially as the job was over a tenner. The gave me £20 which I put in my sun visor and took them on their way to the drop off address which they said was 15 W****** Road, NOT the address that they'd told the office they were going to! Never mind, that's not that unusual. I tell the office the new address and Ian updates it on my datahead. En route, they ask to go to the 24 hour Paki garage to buy ale, fair enough, one gets out, buys four Koppaburg and we continue to their destination. The trip clocks £12.80 and the lad who paid me tells me to just give him a fiver back, a £2.20 tip, happy days! As the road they want dropping off in is a dead end I let them get out before spinning the car around at the turning point and fucking off to my next adventure. I drive past them on my way out noticing that they hadn't gone into a house yet.

Ian then tells me that they later did a wait and return to pretty much where I picked them up from and when the driver asked for the £20 fare they pulled a knife and not only refused to pay, they robbed him of £100 takings as well! I tell Ian of the above tale and tell him I'll scamper back to see if the Transit is still there and give him the reg number. It still is! I phone Ian with the reg and despite him screaming at me to drive away now as they may be watching, I get out to check that both plates match as the rear doors are white and the rest of the van is dark blue. They match and much to his relief, I drive away.

I remember at the time asking them why they were waiting in a van. I was expecting them to say that they wanted a taxi as it ahd broken down, but they said that it belonged to their uncle and he never locked it. I thought it strange because they had clearly been drinking and waiting whilst pissed in a motor vehicle for a taxi isn't the smartest move as you can still get banned for that.

So why didn't they rob me? A good question. They did ask me if I'd been busy, but as always, I replied with my stock answer of only just started and they are only my second job of the night.

[fried onions]

Did you get anywhere with your Top Tramps game?

[Yellowperil]

I had a taxi turn into Gardens one night. It was a fucker because I wanted "Close" which was eight streets away.

Was it Royal Gardens?

[Split_Pin]

Pretty bloody scary that. Good answer on not being busy too, I wouldn't have thought of that.

[Warren t claim]

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Seven years ago today this beauty managed to drop a valve one week and 1225 miles into my ownership.

Tempus Fugit.

[Warren t claim]

Fun and games from a few days ago.

First job of the night. Pick up at a supervised housing estate called Ash Villas, pictured below.

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This was the place that I dropped off the lad in my 405 who'd managed to shit, piss and puke himself on the first Monday I worked nearly 20 years ago. He spent the entire trip punching the palm of his hand saying "I'm gonna kill her" over and over again.

Anyway, I get sent the job to pick up this lad with the usual MONEY UP FRONT message that all jobs beginning or ending there get. The lad, who clearly has learning difficulties either through drink, drugs or a bad twist of fate hops in the car behind me. He asks to be taken to Liscard House, a block of flats pictured below.

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No problem. I tell him that it's money up front, something that the telephonist had already told him when he made the booking. He tells me that his mum is going to pay me when we get there, yeah right! This raises a few red flags, the biggest being that he'll go into the block of flats to "get my money" and never come back out! He calls his mum on his mobile and asks me to speak to her. She tells me that she'll pay me so I inform both her and her son that I'll do the trip if I can hang onto his phone, a brand new Samsung flip, until I get paid.

I drive him there and he promptly gets out to fetch the money, so far so good. After eight minutes (on waiting time) she arrives purse in hand, so far so good. She tells him to get back into my car and go home. I explain that he can't do that as I've got another job to go to. He keeps asking her to pay me but she refuses and starts getting aggressive...

Now, nobody in their right mind would surrender a brand new, unlocked without a PIN, Samsung flip screen mobile worth £800 for a £6.95 taxi ride so I was sure I'll get paid, sadly not! In an unexpected move, she opens my driver's door, starts trying to attack me and demanding that I hand his phone back! All this time she's screaming at him to start hitting me! Despite being a bit mongy, he knows that isn't a good idea and tries to pull his mum away.

Now, followers of this thread will remember me posting about the incident between Frank and John 2 where John in a fit of rage opened Frank's driver's door causing Frank to spark him out. This went to court and they agreed that opening a driver's door is considered an act of aggression worthy of a slap.

I really didn't want to slap her but as she was attacking both me and the car I gave her a pacifying shove away from my driver's seat. She staggered back, I closed and hit the central locking. Time to make my exit. As I was reversing she was still trying to get to me with no luck. I backed out of the car park and drove away, still in possession of his new £800 phone.

Now, I'll admit to being a cunt, but I'm not a fucking cunt and I did feel a bit sorry for the lad so I phoned the operator and explained the situation. Despite the car park of Liscard House being covered by CCTV I was a bit concerned about any "trial by facebook" that may happen if mongy mum sobers up and decides to post her side of the story. Ian, our best oppo IMHO, agrees and tells me to hang onto the phone while he weighs up what to do.

An hour later he shouts me with a solution. He's spoken with the staff at Ash Villas and they've agreed to pay me his taxi fare in full on their account that they have with us. Great news, all I have to do is drop the phone off whenever I'm passing. Being a cunt, but not as I said earlier a fucking cunt, I wait ten hours and pop into the office of Ash Villas to return his phone. I explain the situation to a support worker on the desk called Tanya, quite pretty, slightly flirty and a great rack ( a single W.T.C would've extracted her mobile number and secured a firm appointment for drinks at a later date) and she types me a receipt which I take to my office for them to scan so I get no future comeback.